Dissociation Addiction Disorder (DAD)

Our whole lives we are constantly looking outside of ourselves for approval and to fit in

Fraser Trevor

Link Author

Title: Our whole lives we are constantly looking outside of ourselves for approval and to fit in
Author: Fraser Trevor
Rating 5 of 5 Des:

Our whole lives we are constantly looking outside of ourselves for approval and to fit in. This happens first a child - when we adapt to m...

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<span style="background-color: white; color: #333333; font-family: "courier new" , "courier" , monospace; font-size: medium;">Our whole lives we are constantly looking outside of ourselves for approval and to fit in. This happens first a child - when we adapt to meet our parents needs so that we can get approval.<br /><br />Then, as we get older, it could be a group of friends, or adapt to how we think our romantic partner thinks we should be - or the opposite - we rebel against how anyone thinks we should be and we stand out by not fitting in.<br /><br />No matter how we slice it, adapting ourselves to fitting in or being a rebel and standing out – all of these behaviours stem from our thoughts about what other people think. And living our lives from the perspective of what other people think creates massive pain in our lives. Because when we act based on what other people think, we are acting from the place of a deficit, that is - "I'm not enough, so I am going to change myself to be enough."<br /><br />And this core thought has caused A LOT of pain in our lives.<br /><br />And this core thought has caused a lot of our pain in general.<br /><br />The journey is that through feeling all of this pain, we come back to ourselves. And we stop identifying with what other people think we should be, or we stop rebelling against other people - and instead tune within and listen to whom we really are - at a heart and recovery level.</span><span style="background-color: white; color: #333333; font-family: "courier new" , "courier" , monospace; font-size: medium;">Each and every one of us - and that includes - YOU - is a unique child. We have a unique gift. We are great at something. And life comes into balance and our fullest expression begins to be realised when we align with our true nature that of the child within rather than being a part of the herd or rebelling against the herd.</span><br />
<span style="background-color: white; color: #333333; font-family: "courier new" , "courier" , monospace; font-size: medium;"><br />The journey is within. When we listen to and act from that place - we are trendsetters - we are unique - we are special - and ain't no one else like us is made.</span><span style="background-color: white; color: #333333; font-family: "courier new" , "courier" , monospace; font-size: medium;">And what's cool is when we start to belong to ourselves and express our child within - we put out a different frequency and, as a result, we start attracting and meeting others who are on that new wave length. And what's so cool is in doing so, we no longer need to chase people. When we belong to ourselves, we find who else we belong to.</span><br />
<span style="background-color: white; color: #333333; font-family: "courier new" , "courier" , monospace; font-size: medium;"><br />The joy of living a Self-Approved life is revealed when we begin to allow ourselves to be ourselves - we accept ourselves as we are - we accept ourselves as perfectly imperfect and the inner conflict begins to die down. And our true nature emerges and The Ten Stages supports us in miraculous ways.</span><span style="background-color: white; color: #333333; font-family: "courier new" , "courier" , monospace; font-size: medium;"><br /></span><br />
<span style="background-color: white; color: #333333; font-family: "courier new" , "courier" , monospace; font-size: medium;">How can you start to live a Self- Approved life today?</span><br />
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Our whole lives we are constantly looking outside of ourselves for approval and to fit in

Our whole lives we are constantly looking outside of ourselves for approval and to fit in. This happens first a child - when we adapt to m...

We who have a dissociative addiction disorder may experience too much and intrusions occur.

Fraser Trevor

Link Author

Title: We who have a dissociative addiction disorder may experience too much and intrusions occur.
Author: Fraser Trevor
Rating 5 of 5 Des:

We who have a dissociative addiction disorder may experience too much and intrusions occur. Intrusions happen when one dissociative part ...

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<span style="font-family: "courier new" , "courier" , monospace; font-size: large;">We who have a dissociative addiction disorder may experience too much and intrusions</span><span style="font-family: "courier new" , "courier" , monospace; font-size: large;"> occur. Intrusions happen when one dissociative part intrudes into the experience of another and this may take place in any area of experience, such as memories, thoughts, feelings and sharing with others. Dissociative intrusions include flashbacks, sudden feelings thoughts and behaviours, sensations or pain that have no medical cause and ultimately relapse to a drug of choice. These intrusions happen when a dissociative part of us suddenly enters conscious awareness. It is often hard, at the beginning of the ten stages to know if a symptom is related to dissociation or not.</span>

We who have a dissociative addiction disorder may experience too much and intrusions occur.

We who have a dissociative addiction disorder may experience too much and intrusions occur. Intrusions happen when one dissociative part ...

Dissociated chronic Addiction disorder When we have been trapped by addictions in situations over which we had little or no control

Fraser Trevor

Link Author

Title: Dissociated chronic Addiction disorder When we have been trapped by addictions in situations over which we had little or no control
Author: Fraser Trevor
Rating 5 of 5 Des:

Dissociated chronic Addiction disorder When we have been trapped by addictions in situations over which we had little or no control at th...

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<span style="font-family: "courier new" , "courier" , monospace; font-size: large;">Dissociated chronic Addiction disorder <d .a.d=""> When we have been trapped by addictions in situations over which we had little or no control at the beginning, middle or end, we carry an intense sense of dread even after that situation is removed. This is because we know how bad things can possibly be. And we know that it could possibly happen again. And we know that if it ever does happen again, it might be worse than before.<br /><br />The degree of D.A.D addiction trauma cannot be defined purely in terms of the trauma that a person has experienced. It is important to understand that each person is different and has a different tolerance level to addiction trauma. Therefore, what one person may be able to shake off, another person may not. Therefore more or less exposure to trauma does not necessarily make the D.A.D any more or less severe.<br /><br />D.A.D sufferers may "stuff" or suppress their emotional reaction to addictional traumatic events without resolution either because they believe each event by itself doesn't seem like such a big deal or because they see no satisfactory resolution opportunity available to them. This suppression of "emotional addictional baggage" can continue for a long time either until a "last straw" event occurs, or a safer emotional environment emerges and the damn begins to break.<br /><br />The D.A.D describes how one layer after another of addictional trauma can interact with one another. Sometimes, it is mistakenly assumed that the most recent traumatic D.A.D event in a person's life is the one that brought them to their knees. However, just addressing that single most-recent event may possibly be an invalidating experience for the D.A.D sufferer. Therefore, it is important to recognise that those who suffer from D.A,D may be experiencing feelings from all their traumatic exposure, even as they try to address the most recent traumatic event.<br /><br />This is what differentiates D.A.D from the classic D.I.D diagnosis - which typically describes an emotional response to a single or to a discrete number of traumatic events.</d></span>

Dissociated chronic Addiction disorder <D.A.D> When we have been trapped by addictions in situations over which we had little or no control

Dissociated chronic Addiction disorder When we have been trapped by addictions in situations over which we had little or no control

Dissociated chronic Addiction disorder When we have been trapped by addictions in situations over which we had little or no control at th...

Message to ourselves why are we disturbed on the internet and our child within feels intimidated

Fraser Trevor

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Title: Message to ourselves why are we disturbed on the internet and our child within feels intimidated
Author: Fraser Trevor
Rating 5 of 5 Des:

Message to ourselves why are we disturbed on the internet and our child within feels intimidated we are reviewing the use of Memes at th...

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<span style="font-family: "courier new" , "courier" , monospace; font-size: large;">Message to ourselves why are we disturbed on the internet and our child within feels intimidated we are reviewing the use of Memes at the ten stages. The Ten Stages are by their nature gentle and self-nurturing and Constant absolutist statements are quite jarring and really quite difficult to deal with on a regular basis. We find it hard not to feel guilty for not being strong and 'getting on with the job'. So when statements are used in absolutist terms they are often misused in a judgemental manner suitable for cultist dictatorial statements but not the reasoned gentleness of loving-kindness to all. We are in the de-programming forum not in a the parental absolutist voice forum.<br /><br /><br /><br />There's a lot of ways we can help ourselves, and this sort of lecturing and stern, tough love is what makes us feel as tho it's our fault we're not better already.</span><br />
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Message to ourselves why are we disturbed on the internet and our child within feels intimidated

Message to ourselves why are we disturbed on the internet and our child within feels intimidated we are reviewing the use of Memes at th...

We the dissociated in recovery try to maintain our outward facade without the relief from the racing mind

Fraser Trevor

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Title: We the dissociated in recovery try to maintain our outward facade without the relief from the racing mind
Author: Fraser Trevor
Rating 5 of 5 Des:

The real need to maintain a meditation practice.We the dissociated in recovery try to maintain our outward facade without the relief from ...

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<span style="font-family: "courier new" , "courier" , monospace; font-size: large;">The real need to maintain a meditation practice.We the dissociated in recovery try to maintain our outward facade without the relief from the racing mind - and the resulting overwhelming emotions - that drugs had once provided. Unless we do something to be rid of the discomfort and pain created by trying to present one coherent persona to the world while inside a hundred different 'selves' manifest themselves - the angry 'self', the shameful 'self', the remorseful 'self', the indignant 'self', the smug and superior 'self',etc. - there is a distinct probability we will return to the dissociated 'pain-killers' that seemed to have worked at one point to relieve such psychic pain.</span>

We the dissociated in recovery try to maintain our outward facade without the relief from the racing mind

The real need to maintain a meditation practice.We the dissociated in recovery try to maintain our outward facade without the relief from ...

Dissociation Addiction Disorders are a set of learned responses and a failure to complete numerous important developmental tasks.

Fraser Trevor

Link Author

Title: Dissociation Addiction Disorders are a set of learned responses and a failure to complete numerous important developmental tasks.
Author: Fraser Trevor
Rating 5 of 5 Des:

Dissociation Addiction Disorders are a set of learned responses and a failure to complete numerous important developmental tasks. This m...

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<span style="font-family: "courier new" , "courier" , monospace; font-size: large;">Dissociation Addiction Disorders are a set of learned responses and a failure to complete numerous important developmental tasks. This means that it is environmentally, not genetically, caused. In other words, unlike most of the diagnoses it is confused with, it is neither inborn nor inherited.It not a disease As such it is learned. It is not inscribed in your DNA. It is a disorder caused by nurture (or lack thereof), not nature.</span>

Dissociation Addiction Disorders are a set of learned responses and a failure to complete numerous important developmental tasks.

Dissociation Addiction Disorders are a set of learned responses and a failure to complete numerous important developmental tasks. This m...

We with a dissociative addiction disorder may experience too much and intrusions may occur.

Fraser Trevor

Link Author

Title: We with a dissociative addiction disorder may experience too much and intrusions may occur.
Author: Fraser Trevor
Rating 5 of 5 Des:

We with a dissociative addiction disorder may experience too much and intrusions may occur. Intrusions happen when one dissociative part...

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<span style="font-family: "courier new" , "courier" , monospace; font-size: large;">We with a dissociative addiction disorder may experience too much and intrusions may occur. Intrusions happen when one dissociative part intrudes into the experience of another and this may take place in any area of experience, such as memories, thoughts, feelings and sharing with others. Dissociative intrusions include flashbacks, sudden feelings thoughts and behaviours, sensations or pain that have no medical cause and ultimately relapse to a drug of choice.  These intrusions happen when a dissociative part of us suddenly enters conscious awareness. It is often hard, at the beginning of the ten stages to know if a symptom is related to dissociation or not.</span>

We with a dissociative addiction disorder may experience too much and intrusions may occur.

We with a dissociative addiction disorder may experience too much and intrusions may occur. Intrusions happen when one dissociative part...

Dissociative Addiction Disorders (DAD) involve a loss of certain cognitive functions

Fraser Trevor

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Title: Dissociative Addiction Disorders (DAD) involve a loss of certain cognitive functions
Author: Fraser Trevor
Rating 5 of 5 Des:

Dissociative Addiction Disorders (DAD) involve a loss of certain cognitive functions, therefore meaning you can experience too little. Th...

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<span style="font-family: Courier New, Courier, monospace; font-size: large;">Dissociative Addiction Disorders (DAD) involve a loss of certain cognitive functions, therefore meaning  you can experience too little. This can be things such as amnesia, loss of a skill or piece of knowledge. It’s common for people with a dissociative addiction disorders to be unable to feel an emotion or sensation in the body. This means they become emotionally or physically numb and a separate part of us holds an experience or sensation that can’t be felt.<br /><br />We with a dissociative addiction disorder often experience amnesia that goes beyond the normal range of forgetfulness. They’re also susceptible to time distortions and feel time go by too quickly or slowly. Often we will experience depersonalisation and feel as if we only exist in our head. We become alienated from our body and are insensitive to physical pain or lack sensation in some parts of our body. Depersonalisation is usually an attempt to avoid or regulate overwhelming feelings or experiences, usually of abuse.<br /><br />De-realisation, where events or surroundings seem unreal may also be experienced. The world may feel unreal as if we are in a dream or a play.We with a dissociative addiction disorder, these events may be related to parts of the personality that are living in a trauma time. These parts may confuse the present with the past and therefore do not experience the present as real.</span>

Dissociative Addiction Disorders (DAD) involve a loss of certain cognitive functions

Dissociative Addiction Disorders (DAD) involve a loss of certain cognitive functions, therefore meaning you can experience too little. Th...

We who have a dissociative addiction disorders, our symptoms are chronic and interfere with daily life.

Fraser Trevor

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Title: We who have a dissociative addiction disorders, our symptoms are chronic and interfere with daily life.
Author: Fraser Trevor
Rating 5 of 5 Des:

Dissociation involves many symptoms that range from mild to severe and temporary to chronic. We who have a dissociative addiction disord...

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<span style="font-family: "courier new" , "courier" , monospace; font-size: large;">Dissociation involves many symptoms that range from mild to severe and temporary to chronic. We who have a dissociative addiction disorders, our symptoms are chronic and interfere with daily life.</span><br />
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<span style="font-family: "courier new" , "courier" , monospace; font-size: large;">We with dissociative disorders do not arrive in therapy with complaints about our identity and sense of self, rather they present with symptoms such as sleep disturbances, relational problems, depression and anxiety. We often find it hard to describe our inner experiences and may not share these details unless asked directly because they’re ashamed. Often, these frightening symptoms are directly related to the disowned addiction actions of other parts of the personality. Understanding the nature of these symptoms  usually leads to us feeling more comfortable and understood. <br /><br />A major symptom of dissociation is involuntariness, whereby were we are aware of thoughts and sensations, but these experiences do not seem to belong to us.<br /><br />Each dissociative part of our personality has the potential to develop an individual view of self, others and the world. These opposing views can lead to us being very confused about who we are. It’s pertinent  to remind ourselves  that dissociative parts of our addiction personality are not separate identities living in one body, but rather parts of us that are not yet functioning in a coordinated way.<br /><br />We then looked at how our inner division can manifest in a range that can broadly be described as experiencing too little or too much.</span></div>

We who have a dissociative addiction disorders, our symptoms are chronic and interfere with daily life.

Dissociation involves many symptoms that range from mild to severe and temporary to chronic. We who have a dissociative addiction disord...

Recovery is about getting the parts to function.

Fraser Trevor

Link Author

Title: Recovery is about getting the parts to function.
Author: Fraser Trevor
Rating 5 of 5 Des:

Dissociative addiction parts of our personality are not actually separate identities in one body, but rather parts of a single individua...

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<span style="font-family: "courier new" , "courier" , monospace; font-size: large;">Dissociative addiction parts of our personality are not actually separate identities in one body, but rather parts of a single individual that are not yet functioning together in a smooth, coordinated, and flexible way.Recovery is about getting the parts to function.</span>

Recovery is about getting the parts to function.

Dissociative addiction parts of our personality are not actually separate identities in one body, but rather parts of a single individua...

Gazing into a mirror, what is it that you see?

Fraser Trevor

Link Author

Title: Gazing into a mirror, what is it that you see?
Author: Fraser Trevor
Rating 5 of 5 Des:

Gazing into a mirror, what is it that you see? You see a reflection of the person others see when they look at you. If the mirror should...

Gazing into a mirror, what is it that you see?

Gazing into a mirror, what is it that you see? You see a reflection of the person others see when they look at you. If the mirror should...

If we as survivors of abuse do not gain awareness and understanding of our abuse issues after we get sober, then we will remain in the grips of the trauma

Fraser Trevor

Link Author

Title: If we as survivors of abuse do not gain awareness and understanding of our abuse issues after we get sober, then we will remain in the grips of the trauma
Author: Fraser Trevor
Rating 5 of 5 Des:

If we as survivors of abuse do not gain awareness and understanding of our abuse issues after we get sober, then we will remain in the gri...

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<span style="font-family: Courier New, Courier, monospace; font-size: large;">If we as survivors of abuse do not gain awareness and understanding of our abuse issues after we get sober, then we will remain in the grips of the trauma and its aftershock. It is the unconscious factors operating in the background that leave us at risk of relapse from our dissociations.<br /><br />On the other hand, as we can testify by our own lives, that we were working very hard on our abuse issues, doing everything humanly possible to stay sober and still struggling. We were making great progress with sobriety, but something was missing. That missing piece was the ten stages and child within aspect and it wasn't until we included that in our recovery treatment plan that we were able to get over the hump. Both are crucial for successful long-term recovery.<br /><br />Since we know the profound impact that child abuse and neglect has on brain chemistry, it is also my belief that when we engage in behaviours like child within, the three hour workshops, study groups, meditations and Letting Go that help us connect to our child within that the validation, support and understanding that accompanies these activities is not only beneficial on the emotional level but it also helps balance out the neurotransmitters and heal brain trauma as well.<br /><br />We know in our own experience as we became awakened about the effects of child abuse it is so mind-boggling and powerful it felt like brain cells and neurotransmitters were firing so strongly in our heads it was as if our brain was rearranging itself.Building new pathways. The information was so staggering and innovative in our mind because we had never heard it before and it changed our lives completely.<br /><br /> The fact that we had awareness of our healthy child within was what empowered us and eliminated the abuse as a risk factor for relapse. With awareness came understanding for ourself and our behaviours, with understanding came forgiveness of ourself and motivation to study on our deeply buried issues. Awareness and understanding also began to lift the veil of shame and with that came a sense of freedom and the ability to develop a healthier identity.<br /><br />When we would read a book about adult survivors of abuse or attend a course workshop, we identified so deeply that it was as if the workshops was written specifically about us. Another light bulb came on and we were astounded to learn that there was an explanation for all the craziness in our life. Suddenly, our entire life made sense and this information becomes incredibly healing.</span>

If we as survivors of abuse do not gain awareness and understanding of our abuse issues after we get sober, then we will remain in the grips of the trauma

If we as survivors of abuse do not gain awareness and understanding of our abuse issues after we get sober, then we will remain in the gri...

Issues for the survivor of Dissociation Addiction Disorders, if they are entering traditional treatment for addiction or AA

Fraser Trevor

Link Author

Title: Issues for the survivor of Dissociation Addiction Disorders, if they are entering traditional treatment for addiction or AA
Author: Fraser Trevor
Rating 5 of 5 Des:

Issues for the survivor of Dissociation Addiction Disorders, if they are entering traditional treatment for addiction or AA, is that many ...

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<span style="font-family: "courier new" , "courier" , monospace; font-size: large;"><br />Issues for the survivor of Dissociation Addiction Disorders, if they are entering traditional treatment for addiction or AA, is that many of the methods used are counter productive. Angry, forceful confrontations that are frequently used to break denial can push those with abusive backgrounds further into resistance, because they feel they're being violated again. The whole powerlessness concept is threatening because they were unable to control what was done to them as a child so it's terrifying to think they have no power as an adult. The structure and tone of treatment and AA tends to be punitive, shaming, rigid and blaming, which resembles the atmosphere they grew up in. Traditional treatment methods often make the survivor of abuse feel re-victimised.<br /><br />Considering the fact that the majority of people entering treatment for addiction have been abused, this gives us another clear indication as to why traditional treatment is not successful for so many people. It is our opinion that those survivors who do feel comfortable in AA and traditional treatment do so because,  one of the most common effects of child abuse leaves survivors of abuse unconsciously drawn to situations and people that simulate their dysfunctional family system. It's familiar to them. On some level they feel comfortable in AA and yet on another level it incites great internal conflict. That was the case for us and the longer we stayed sober and the deeper we worked on our childhood abuse issues, the more uncomfortable we became with certain aspects of AA. Treatment for alcoholism and drug addiction needs to empower the individual and that is not the case with AA and mainstream rehabilitation centres.<br /><br />It's also important to note here that although we're talking specifically about the effects of child abuse and neglect, that any high-stress, traumatic event in life has the potential to alter and damage the body's stress response system and brain chemistry. Other events like natural disasters, kidnapping, civilians in war or those engaging in combat, prisoners of war, a car wreck, plane wreck, a terrorist attack, chronic health conditions, domestic violence, unhealthy relationships or other similar scenarios where someone is in crises, traumatized and unable to escape or forced to live with ongoing stress could have the same results and make one vulnerable to addiction.</span>

Issues for the survivor of Dissociation Addiction Disorders, if they are entering traditional treatment for addiction or AA

Issues for the survivor of Dissociation Addiction Disorders, if they are entering traditional treatment for addiction or AA, is that many ...

Dissociation Addiction Disorder is not a mental illness with a biological cause

Fraser Trevor

Link Author

Title: Dissociation Addiction Disorder is not a mental illness with a biological cause
Author: Fraser Trevor
Rating 5 of 5 Des:

Dissociation Addiction Disorder is not a mental illness with a biological cause, but rather the result of a series of developmental adapta...

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<span style="font-family: Courier New, Courier, monospace; font-size: large;">Dissociation Addiction Disorder is not a mental illness with a biological cause, but rather the result of a series of developmental adaptations in the brain to a difficult early life environment. It is now widely accepted that DAD results from trauma and disrespect in childhood, starting at a very young age, generally at the hands of a caregiver. Although the child's parents may not have been directly involved in the abuse, there has usually been some inability on their part to help the child to process or recover from whatever trauma they have experienced. The traumatic events therefore remain sealed off - dissociated and unprocessed - from the main conscious awareness and developing identity of the child. This can result in either complete or partial amnesia for what has happened, and 'gaps' in the person's narrative account of their life. One of the principal functions of DID is 'denial' - to allow the person to continue with life, unaware of the extreme abuse that they have suffered, by blocking it out of their memory and mind.</span>

Dissociation Addiction Disorder is not a mental illness with a biological cause

Dissociation Addiction Disorder is not a mental illness with a biological cause, but rather the result of a series of developmental adapta...

Trauma that leads to the escape through addictions doesn’t just affect the mind and the emotions.

Fraser Trevor

Link Author

Title: Trauma that leads to the escape through addictions doesn’t just affect the mind and the emotions.
Author: Fraser Trevor
Rating 5 of 5 Des:

Trauma that leads to the escape through addictions doesn’t just affect the mind and the emotions. It profoundly affects the brain and the ...

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<span style="font-family: Courier New, Courier, monospace; font-size: large;">Trauma that leads to the escape through addictions doesn’t just affect the mind and the emotions. It profoundly affects the brain and the body too. Often ‘the body remembers’ what the mind cannot.<br /><br />Why is it that so many trauma survivors not only suffer from ‘psychological’ disorders such as Complex Post Traumatic Stress Disorder (PTSD) and Dissociative Addiction Disorder (DAD) but also from a whole raft of physical issues — chronic pain; frequent or recurrent infections; auto-immune disorders such as Chronic Fatigue Syndrome (aka ME), fibromyalgia and rheumatoid arthritis; and difficulty in both connecting with the body and living healthily? The body is both the medium through which often the original trauma was enacted, and the source of ongoing suffering and self-hatred.</span>

Trauma that leads to the escape through addictions doesn’t just affect the mind and the emotions.

Trauma that leads to the escape through addictions doesn’t just affect the mind and the emotions. It profoundly affects the brain and the ...

We can point you to the child within you.

Fraser Trevor

Link Author

Title: We can point you to the child within you.
Author: Fraser Trevor
Rating 5 of 5 Des:

We can point you to the child within you. Maybe you will awaken to the direct experience of your child. Maybe you will catch the fire of...

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<span style="font-family: Courier New, Courier, monospace; font-size: large;"><br /><br />We can point you to the child within you. Maybe you will awaken to the direct experience of your child. Maybe you will catch the fire of the transmission of your truth. But there is one thing that no one can give you: the honesty and integrity that alone will bring you completely to the other shore. No one can give you the strength of character necessary for profound recovery experience to become the catalyst for the evolutionary transformation called "RECOVERED." Only you can find that passion within that burns with an integrity that will not settle for anything less than your Truth.</span>Related articles<br />
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We can point you to the child within you.

We can point you to the child within you. Maybe you will awaken to the direct experience of your child. Maybe you will catch the fire of...

Anybody can awaken to the truth of full recovery

Fraser Trevor

Link Author

Title: Anybody can awaken to the truth of full recovery
Author: Fraser Trevor
Rating 5 of 5 Des:

Anybody can awaken to the truth of full recovery. And yet, when it is realised, often we who has committed a large portion of our life...

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<span style="font-family: "courier new" , "courier" , monospace; font-size: large;">Anybody can awaken to the truth of full recovery. And yet, when it is realised, often we who has committed a large portion of our life to the recovery path are more readily able to let go and flow with that realisation than the person who hasn’t been on a recovery path. Does that have anything to do with some sort of merit earned by sitting in a group, or whatever your practice was? Absolutely not! It has nothing to do with that. It has nothing whatever to do with preparing the rooms, doing service, or giving main shares for our recovery merit. It’s just that it’s possible, though not a guarantee, that someone who has made the recovery search their priority in life is already in touch with the truth when recovery happens. Recovery was wanted more than anything else, and our life has been a living, walking, breathing demonstration of this recovery.<br /><br />But if those who walk in off the street and realise the truth of their being want it just as much as those who put in decades of recovery practice, guess what? They are at no disadvantage whatsoever. None. Zero. And by the way, having put decades into the recovery life and meditational practice does not necessarily mean that we actually value the truth more than anything else. It’s no guarantee. But to take awakening into our recovery requires a certain sort of fierce commitment to the truth. It is a surrender to what is realised, a surrender to not be moved in the face of anything. And for anybody who loves the truth, really loves the truth, this surrender is not going to be avoided.<br /><br />In the past, the deepest teachings were reserved for a very small part of the recovery population. Those were the people who became deacons of the order, and committed their entire existence to get the teachings. You couldn’t get the teachings until you’d done that, walked away from family and friends and life as you knew it, and put everything on the line. And even then, teachers wouldn’t give the teachings to you immediately. They’d probably make you wait some years. Why? Because those few recovered members knew that to really take awakening to recovery or liberation was going to require that kind of commitment, that kind of love of the truth, and the kind of person who would put all their eggs into that basket, right there.<br /><br />Today you do not have to live in that rarified environment or commit our entire life to get the teachings of the truth. And yet, to realise our recovery truth and then take it all the way into living and being what we really are, fully and completely, the internal commitment is not any less. It can’t be any less because nothing less than a full, internal love of truth will do. If you love anything more than you love the truth, there’s no way this realisation can complete itself. You can realise it, you can awaken, and you can have a nice recovery experience, but it’s not going to be something that’s going to be stable and effortless, or last forever. That’s just the physics of it. I’m not writing the rules. It’s just the way things are.<br /><br />When you realise the truth, then you know that this truth is not fooling around. This truth wants you, and it wants your life, and it’s going to devour you and eat you up for dinner. The truth is not playing games. I’ve had more than one person say, “ how do I turn this off? How do I back out of this deal? This isn’t what I signed up for.” And the only answer is, “Sorry, it’s too late, you can’t back out. You can walk away from us and from all teachers, and from recovery altogether. You can go to the end of the earth and play some other game, but it’s too late. You can’t un-realise what you realise.” It’s a game until it’s not, but by the time you realise that it’s not a game, you can’t back out.<br /><br />We want our Sobriety,liberation, freedom, bliss, peace, love, and total release from fear. We want all the accoutrements of recovery without having to pay the price. We don’t want to pay the price of a total commitment,... a total commitment. Were not speaking of anything that is separate or different from our life. This doesn’t have anything to do with the monastery or leaving your day-to-day existence. The truth is here in every single moment of our life. That’s the truth. It’s not separate from our life. We can’t run away from ourself and our life in order to awaken to recovery reality. our life is our path to awakening.We Stop and open our eyes: We were free from the very beginning.<br /><br />Please understand that it’s not you that wakes up; it’s reality that wakes up, the truth wakes up. You are not recovered; recovery is recovered. Ultimately this realisation doesn’t have anything to do with individuals, since there aren’t any separate individuals. That is the whole illusion, that there is something separate from the ultimate reality. When it’s clear that there’s nothing going on other than the ultimate reality, it’s a done deal -- Recovery becomes effortless.</span><br />
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Anybody can awaken to the truth of full recovery

Anybody can awaken to the truth of full recovery. And yet, when it is realised, often we who has committed a large portion of our life...

Part of living our true ten stage recovery and not our shadow recovery is being able to LIVE in and with uncertainty.

Fraser Trevor

Link Author

Title: Part of living our true ten stage recovery and not our shadow recovery is being able to LIVE in and with uncertainty.
Author: Fraser Trevor
Rating 5 of 5 Des:

Part of living our true ten stage recovery and not our shadow recovery is being able to LIVE in and with uncertainty. It's about tru...

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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjGy6JUIhsc6CUCAKuF63pJIQ1B8-KdfFrvy3OJaErFCqTt0OuUNHYu61b-W3GgDjwnvqM8i1un1OG-jhjWtpE7xl6Fe5oukI-mflMB7mwQoe5NuAcT8VUKktB849fY076CFew9Eo-knone/s1600/daily+solution45.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="118" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjGy6JUIhsc6CUCAKuF63pJIQ1B8-KdfFrvy3OJaErFCqTt0OuUNHYu61b-W3GgDjwnvqM8i1un1OG-jhjWtpE7xl6Fe5oukI-mflMB7mwQoe5NuAcT8VUKktB849fY076CFew9Eo-knone/s320/daily+solution45.jpg" width="320" /></a></div>
<span style="font-family: "courier new" , "courier" , monospace; font-size: large;">Part of living our true ten stage recovery and not our shadow recovery is being able to LIVE in and with uncertainty. It's about trusting completely our perfect child within to have our back. It's about realising we have a recovery gift and our job is to GIVE that gift to the world. It's about doing what's right, rather than what's easy. It's about turning STAGER and showing up - whether we are inspired or not.<br /><br />Are you living in your shadow recovery? Are you bound by fate or creating your own recovery destiny?</span><br />
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Part of living our true ten stage recovery and not our shadow recovery is being able to LIVE in and with uncertainty.

Part of living our true ten stage recovery and not our shadow recovery is being able to LIVE in and with uncertainty. It's about tru...

If we don’t allow ourselves to feel and be honest about what’s inside our child within without judgement – we can never really change.

Fraser Trevor

Link Author

Title: If we don’t allow ourselves to feel and be honest about what’s inside our child within without judgement – we can never really change.
Author: Fraser Trevor
Rating 5 of 5 Des:

If we don’t allow ourselves to feel and be honest about what’s inside our child within without judgement – we can never really change. W...

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<span style="font-family: "courier new" , "courier" , monospace; font-size: large;">If we don’t allow ourselves to feel and be honest about what’s inside our child within without judgement – we can never really change.<br /><br />We can change our clothes, we can change our diet and we can start to move our body, but none of that will do any good without going into the depths of the feelings we have suppressed for so long by our child within.<br /><br /> <br /><br />What feelings are we afraid to feel?<br /><br /> <br /><br />What feelings do we try to escape?<br /><br /> <br /><br />What feelings are you holding back because we think you are a bad person if you feel them?<br /><br /> <br /><br />You see – these places are the places we need to go if we are to liberate our child hidden within.<br /><br /> <br /><br />This is what Carl Jung meant when he said, “Enlightenment is not imaging figures of light, but making the dark conscious.”<br /><br /> <br /><br />We can’t make our dark side conscious if we are too self-judgmental to allow it to come forward – this is a recovery bypass and it’s as deadly as a blocked artery.</span>

If we don’t allow ourselves to feel and be honest about what’s inside our child within without judgement – we can never really change.

If we don’t allow ourselves to feel and be honest about what’s inside our child within without judgement – we can never really change. W...

When life gets dark, that’s when we get to discover our true Light at the Stages.

Fraser Trevor

Link Author

Title: When life gets dark, that’s when we get to discover our true Light at the Stages.
Author: Fraser Trevor
Rating 5 of 5 Des:

Pain in our life will happen. It just will. The question you want to ask yourself is, “What does this pain mean?” Does it mean that li...

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<span style="font-family: "courier new" , "courier" , monospace; font-size: large;">Pain in our life will happen.<br /><br />It just will.<br /><br />The question you want to ask yourself is, “What does this pain mean?”<br /><br />Does it mean that life is against you?<br /><br />Does it mean that you are worthless?<br /><br />Does it mean that someone like you deserves to be in pain?<br /><br /> <br /><br />Or…<br /><br /> <br /><br />Does it mean that you are growing?<br /><br /> <br /><br />Does it mean there is something to learn here?<br /><br /> <br /><br />Does it mean that you can overcome this pain by changing your action over time?<br /><br /> <br /><br />Does it mean that you are simply alive and sometimes there is pain in life?<br /><br /> <br /><br />You see, it is never what happens to us that ultimately defines our lives, but what we do about what happens.<br /><br /> <br /><br />Your power is always in your response, never in your circumstance.<br /><br /> <br /><br />Now one thing I want to point out in a blog like this is that you still must heal. When tragedy strikes, there is a natural healing process that has to take place.<br /><br /> <br /><br />To just try to wish it, chant it, green juice it away – won’t work.<br /><br /> <br /><br />There are feelings that need to be felt, things that need to be said and a whole grieving process that has to be gone through.<br /><br /> <br /><br />This is not a blog asking you to do a spiritual bypass where you just pretend something never happened. On the contrary, this is about getting real about what happened, feeling your feelings fully and once you have allowed yourself to heal, knowing that you are not a victim of what happened, you are what you choose to become.<br /><br /> <br /><br />Are you letting yourself fully feel?<br /><br /> <br /><br />Are you letting yourself have space to allow your emotions to come to the surface?<br /><br /> <br /><br />Can you see that in the long run you are not a victim, you are so much more than that?!<br /><br /> <br /><br />When life gets dark, that’s when we get to discover our true Light at the Stages.</span><br />
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<li class="zemanta-article-ul-li-image zemanta-article-ul-li" style="background: none; display: block; float: left; font-size: 11px; list-style: none; margin: 2px 10px 10px 2px; padding: 0; text-align: left; vertical-align: top; width: 84px;"><a href="http://mindofcalm.blogspot.com/2015/12/the-child-within-is-frozen-which-is.html" style="border-radius: 2px; box-shadow: 0px 0px 4px #999; display: block; padding: 2px; text-decoration: none;" target="_blank"><img src="//i.zemanta.com/364062755_80_80.jpg" style="border: 0; display: block; margin: 0; max-width: 100%; padding: 0; width: 80px;" /></a><a href="http://mindofcalm.blogspot.com/2015/12/the-child-within-is-frozen-which-is.html" style="background-image: none; display: block; height: 83px; line-height: 12pt; overflow: hidden; padding: 5px 2px 0 2px; text-decoration: none;" target="_blank">The child within is frozen which is caused by intense fear during childhood.</a></li>
<li class="zemanta-article-ul-li-image zemanta-article-ul-li" style="background: none; display: block; float: left; font-size: 11px; list-style: none; margin: 2px 10px 10px 2px; padding: 0; text-align: left; vertical-align: top; width: 84px;"><a href="http://stagesevents.blogspot.com/2015/05/at-stages-we-acknowledge-that-to-be.html" style="border-radius: 2px; box-shadow: 0px 0px 4px #999; display: block; padding: 2px; text-decoration: none;" target="_blank"><img src="//i.zemanta.com/340960532_80_80.jpg" style="border: 0; display: block; margin: 0; max-width: 100%; padding: 0; width: 80px;" /></a><a href="http://stagesevents.blogspot.com/2015/05/at-stages-we-acknowledge-that-to-be.html" style="background-image: none; display: block; height: 83px; line-height: 12pt; overflow: hidden; padding: 5px 2px 0 2px; text-decoration: none;" target="_blank">At the Stages we acknowledge that to be present also means to ground ourself and not dissociate</a></li>
<li class="zemanta-article-ul-li-image zemanta-article-ul-li" style="background: none; display: block; float: left; font-size: 11px; list-style: none; margin: 2px 10px 10px 2px; padding: 0; text-align: left; vertical-align: top; width: 84px;"><a href="http://stagesevents.blogspot.com/2015/12/our-feelings-are-most-common-way-our.html" style="border-radius: 2px; box-shadow: 0px 0px 4px #999; display: block; padding: 2px; text-decoration: none;" target="_blank"><img src="//i.zemanta.com/364124522_80_80.jpg" style="border: 0; display: block; margin: 0; max-width: 100%; padding: 0; width: 80px;" /></a><a href="http://stagesevents.blogspot.com/2015/12/our-feelings-are-most-common-way-our.html" style="background-image: none; display: block; height: 83px; line-height: 12pt; overflow: hidden; padding: 5px 2px 0 2px; text-decoration: none;" target="_blank">Our feelings are the most common way our inner guidance talks with our child within.</a></li>
<li class="zemanta-article-ul-li-image zemanta-article-ul-li" style="background: none; display: block; float: left; font-size: 11px; list-style: none; margin: 2px 10px 10px 2px; padding: 0; text-align: left; vertical-align: top; width: 84px;"><a href="http://socialpsychologists.blogspot.com/2015/05/dissy-means-feeling-detached-from.html" style="border-radius: 2px; box-shadow: 0px 0px 4px #999; display: block; padding: 2px; text-decoration: none;" target="_blank"><img src="//i.zemanta.com/342792400_80_80.jpg" style="border: 0; display: block; margin: 0; max-width: 100%; padding: 0; width: 80px;" /></a><a href="http://socialpsychologists.blogspot.com/2015/05/dissy-means-feeling-detached-from.html" style="background-image: none; display: block; height: 83px; line-height: 12pt; overflow: hidden; padding: 5px 2px 0 2px; text-decoration: none;" target="_blank">'DISSY' means feeling detached from yourself</a></li>
<li class="zemanta-article-ul-li-image zemanta-article-ul-li" style="background: none; display: block; float: left; font-size: 11px; list-style: none; margin: 2px 10px 10px 2px; padding: 0; text-align: left; vertical-align: top; width: 84px;"><a href="http://stagesevents.blogspot.com/2015/04/loving-kindness-has-become-our-chosen.html" style="border-radius: 2px; box-shadow: 0px 0px 4px #999; display: block; padding: 2px; text-decoration: none;" target="_blank"><img src="//i.zemanta.com/336853303_80_80.jpg" style="border: 0; display: block; margin: 0; max-width: 100%; padding: 0; width: 80px;" /></a><a href="http://stagesevents.blogspot.com/2015/04/loving-kindness-has-become-our-chosen.html" style="background-image: none; display: block; height: 83px; line-height: 12pt; overflow: hidden; padding: 5px 2px 0 2px; text-decoration: none;" target="_blank">Loving kindness has become our chosen stage of choice, for all the times when life gets a bit rough.</a></li>
<li class="zemanta-article-ul-li-image zemanta-article-ul-li" style="background: none; display: block; float: left; font-size: 11px; list-style: none; margin: 2px 10px 10px 2px; padding: 0; text-align: left; vertical-align: top; width: 84px;"><a href="http://intuitivecontact.blogspot.com/2015/06/living-freedom-is-solution-you-become.html" style="border-radius: 2px; box-shadow: 0px 0px 4px #999; display: block; padding: 2px; text-decoration: none;" target="_blank"><img src="//i.zemanta.com/348006898_80_80.jpg" style="border: 0; display: block; margin: 0; max-width: 100%; padding: 0; width: 80px;" /></a><a href="http://intuitivecontact.blogspot.com/2015/06/living-freedom-is-solution-you-become.html" style="background-image: none; display: block; height: 83px; line-height: 12pt; overflow: hidden; padding: 5px 2px 0 2px; text-decoration: none;" target="_blank">Living Freedom is the solution. You become the answer.</a></li>
</ul>
</div>

When life gets dark, that’s when we get to discover our true Light at the Stages.

Pain in our life will happen. It just will. The question you want to ask yourself is, “What does this pain mean?” Does it mean that li...

Hidden Agendas it can be a very intense process to break through all the hidden agendas that hold us back from creating our own recovery life.

Fraser Trevor

Link Author

Title: Hidden Agendas it can be a very intense process to break through all the hidden agendas that hold us back from creating our own recovery life.
Author: Fraser Trevor
Rating 5 of 5 Des:

The thing that we've come to see over and over again when we come to a new recovery with us is that we already know what they want. ...

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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhxJqNsyAgIcxl47zSDVPtr6piNHW6E_G2dlsWQmtsQHTm2Jve33OCNe7MU8pITnyKRCLxP-axMjfR1Udu71kUo8ZpDX23k3IRo3fsAzb3veEBMRZg142iNXjWsdKBEd-yYu-TXszZv8bNC/s1600/lovingkindfulness.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: left; float: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="320" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhxJqNsyAgIcxl47zSDVPtr6piNHW6E_G2dlsWQmtsQHTm2Jve33OCNe7MU8pITnyKRCLxP-axMjfR1Udu71kUo8ZpDX23k3IRo3fsAzb3veEBMRZg142iNXjWsdKBEd-yYu-TXszZv8bNC/s320/lovingkindfulness.jpg" width="214" /></a></div>
<span style="font-family: "courier new" , "courier" , monospace; font-size: large;">The thing that we've come to see over and over again when we come to a new recovery with us is that we already know what they want. We already know what our recovery dreams are. We already know what we have to do, and yet we don't.<br /><br />And it can be a very intense process to break through all the hidden agendas that hold us back from creating our own recovery </span><span style="font-family: "courier new" , "courier" , monospace; font-size: large;">life.</span><br />
<span style="font-family: "courier new" , "courier" , monospace; font-size: large;"><br /><i><span style="font-family: "courier new" , "courier" , monospace;">Here are some:<br /><br />I'm too old.<br /><br />I'm too young.<br /><br />I'm not smart enough.<br /><br />I don't have enough education.<br /><br />I have too much experience.<br /><br />I'm over my childhood.<br /><br />I'm not damaged by my experiences.<br /><br />I don't have enough time.</span></i></span><br />
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<span style="font-family: "courier new" , "courier" , monospace; font-size: large;"><i><span style="font-family: "courier new" , "courier" , monospace;">I can't meditate.<br /><br />There are millions more, but those are some of the most common ones that we see.</span></i><br /><br /><span style="font-family: "courier new" , "courier" , monospace;">And what's fascinating is that these beliefs can overtake us. It's always a miracle when we begin to understand that they are not our beliefs, but our personal beliefs are patterns from our ancestral childhood.</span><br /><br /><span style="font-family: "courier new" , "courier" , monospace;">So it's not so much about learning to change who you are as it is learning to change certain patterns set in childhood within us.</span><br /><br /><span style="font-family: "courier new" , "courier" , monospace;">We've always believed that when we have a limiting belief, it's true in the moment, but not ultimately true.</span><br /><br /><span style="font-family: "courier new" , "courier" , monospace;">So wherever our limiting beliefs are, that circumstance might be true in the moment, but there is always another way of looking at problems and circumstances where you can call forth more resourcefulness and creativity than you thought you had.</span><br /><br /><span style="font-family: "courier new" , "courier" , monospace;">And remember, while circumstances might not be ideal, who you are is FAR greater than that. Circumstances never ultimately dictate how far in life we go, but rather how we respond to our circumstances.</span><br /><br /><span style="font-family: "courier new" , "courier" , monospace;">We are always responsible for how we respond to life. So the question is, if you are experiencing limits in your life, how are you responding? Are you responding with more limitation, or can you broaden your horizons and see that in this moment there is a greater opportunity for more creativity and resourcefulness than you thought you had?</span></span><br />
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Hidden Agendas it can be a very intense process to break through all the hidden agendas that hold us back from creating our own recovery life.

The thing that we've come to see over and over again when we come to a new recovery with us is that we already know what they want. ...

Our child within’s self-esteem reflects how we feel about ourself and contributes to how we approach our world.

Fraser Trevor

Link Author

Title: Our child within’s self-esteem reflects how we feel about ourself and contributes to how we approach our world.
Author: Fraser Trevor
Rating 5 of 5 Des:

Our child within’s self-esteem reflects how we feel about ourself and contributes to how we approach our world. Although our level of self-...

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<span style="clear: right; float: right; font-family: Courier New, Courier, monospace; font-size: large; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-left: 1em;">Our child within’s self-esteem reflects how we feel about ourself and contributes to how we approach our world. Although our level of self-esteem can vary slightly from day to day, we have a general feeling about our value and self-worth. Low self-esteem is reflected in our behaviour, body language, approach to life and overall demeanour.Avoidance Behaviours<img height="213" src="http://img.aws.livestrongcdn.com/ls-article-image-400/cme/cme_public_images/www_livestrong_com/photos.demandstudios.com/getty/article/165/59/86810573_XS.jpg" width="320" />Our child within has low-self esteem, we likely don’t feel comfortable around new people or situations.<br /><br /> If this is the case, we will feel awkward and tend to avoid anything unfamiliar. Often, we will be hesitant to take risks or move out of our comfort zone. With this behaviour, our child within will miss valuable social opportunities and situations where we can learn and grow from a new experience.Low Confidence Level<img height="213" src="http://img.aws.livestrongcdn.com/ls-article-image-400/cme/cme_public_images/www_livestrong_com/photos.demandstudios.com/getty/article/146/158/200415433-001_XS.jpg" width="320" />We will be overly critical of the skills we posses or how we looks.<br />A lack of confidence often goes hand in hand with low self-esteem. We notice our child talking negatively about ourself and our abilities. We will be overly critical of the skills we posses or how we look. We use pessimistic phrasing about the world in general.Our body language, such as slumped shoulders, sad facial expression and downcast eyes, will show a low level of confidence without us even saying a word.</span></div>
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Our child within’s self-esteem reflects how we feel about ourself and contributes to how we approach our world.

Our child within’s self-esteem reflects how we feel about ourself and contributes to how we approach our world. Although our level of self-...

Dissociation Addiction Disorder (DAD)

DAD

Our whole lives we are constantly looking outside of ourselves for approval and to fit in

We who have a dissociative addiction disorder may experience too much and intrusions occur.

Dissociated chronic Addiction disorder When we have been trapped by addictions in situations over which we had little or no control

Message to ourselves why are we disturbed on the internet and our child within feels intimidated

We the dissociated in recovery try to maintain our outward facade without the relief from the racing mind

Dissociation Addiction Disorders are a set of learned responses and a failure to complete numerous important developmental tasks.

We with a dissociative addiction disorder may experience too much and intrusions may occur.

Dissociative Addiction Disorders (DAD) involve a loss of certain cognitive functions

We who have a dissociative addiction disorders, our symptoms are chronic and interfere with daily life.

Recovery is about getting the parts to function.

Gazing into a mirror, what is it that you see?

If we as survivors of abuse do not gain awareness and understanding of our abuse issues after we get sober, then we will remain in the grips of the trauma

Issues for the survivor of Dissociation Addiction Disorders, if they are entering traditional treatment for addiction or AA

Dissociation Addiction Disorder is not a mental illness with a biological cause

Trauma that leads to the escape through addictions doesn’t just affect the mind and the emotions.

We can point you to the child within you.

Anybody can awaken to the truth of full recovery

Part of living our true ten stage recovery and not our shadow recovery is being able to LIVE in and with uncertainty.

If we don’t allow ourselves to feel and be honest about what’s inside our child within without judgement – we can never really change.

When life gets dark, that’s when we get to discover our true Light at the Stages.

Hidden Agendas it can be a very intense process to break through all the hidden agendas that hold us back from creating our own recovery life.

Our child within’s self-esteem reflects how we feel about ourself and contributes to how we approach our world.

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